I am doing something really similar to your storybook - I am focusing on a fantasy mash-up between Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Alice from Alice in Wonderland. First off, I just want to say that you did a wonderful job with your introduction! I know when I was starting mine, I had no clue how to write my introduction in a narrator/story form, and you did such a good job with it. I really like how you challenged the existing understandings and stereotypes of the witches from the original story, making the Witches of the East and West not so bad and the Witches of the North and South have a little unpredictability to them. The photos you picked for your banner and introduction page really fit the theme of your story. Your introduction is long enough for us to understand what you are going to write about, but short and sweet to get to the point and not lose your readers. I really look forward to reading your first story!
I love that you use an in-world character to set up your introduction, and I hope that we get to see more of her personality through the stories she tells. I think it's cool that you've set up a plot that will show the good sides of the wicked witches and perhaps the dark sides of the good witches. There's definitely the potential to give the characters a lot of depth through that kind of storytelling.
It sounds like Ozma is writing from after the events of the original story, so I wonder if the stories that you'll tell will come after that, too! I remember that (spoilers) the wicked witches die, so I hope you find a way to bring them back! That said, I think a "prequel" type story could be fun too, as it might give us a better idea of why everyone acted the way they did in the source material. Great intro, and good luck!
Hey Marielle! I think it's really interesting and fun that you used first person in telling this story to start off with, because I was immediately intrigued and drawn in to the story. The name Ozma is really clever as well. I think you did a great job of telling the readers what the upcoming stories are going to be about, as well as mentioning the good and bad sides to every story. I love those types of stories, that take famous "evil" characters and tell us why they became evil or tell us that the story we have grown up reading is only half of the story! Some of the characters in your story are really popular, which gives readers something familiar to read about, and some characters are new, making your story even more interesting! Your project seems really creative, and I definitely can't wait to read the rest of it!
Hi Marielle! I like the spin off of the Wizard of Oz that you are doing. It's interesting that the point of view is from the ruler of the land, Princess Ozma. Is this a made up character or is it from the original tale of the Wizard of Oz? Anyways, your introduction is well written and I look forward to reading the other four stories of the witches. I'm especially excited to hopefully read about how the witches became to be evil and how the others are good. This is such a classic tale and I think the readers with be drawn to it immediately. One suggestion that could help your introduction could be to include just a little more background of the witches themselves. Overall, I like the introduction and the photos in your banner and posts really add a little extra to the upcoming stories. Keep of the good work, I look forward to reading other stories!
Hi Marielle! I love the title of your website. The site itself matches your overall theme, so good job! I love that your intro depicted that the Witches won't be so bad after all. The Wizard of Oz movies make you kind of hate them... But this will be fun to change their reputations on your website! You could include some background info about Princess Ozma in your introduction, because I am unfamiliar about her (if she exists). Laying out how you plan to tell her personality might help you when you're writing future stories depicting her tone (or how others see her). I like that you're changing the narrative, and some description here and there could really help when saying why the witches aren't as bad as they once were. Did something happen to make them nicer? Or were they never that bad to begin with? Great job, can't wait to read more!
First of all, great title! It seems like many folk-stories are male centered and this breaks away from that and immediately puts the focus on the witches of Oz. The overall theme of the website fits very well with the topic at hand. The banner for the introduction reminds of Cinderella's castle in Disney World, providing a magical atmosphere. I was wondering who Princess Ozma was? Its been a while since i've seen The Wizard of Oz so my memory may be bad. Is Ozma something of you own creation? Maybe providing some more background information would make her character come to life. With that character background established, it will help the reader follow along with the direction of the subsequent stories. Another idea I thought would be interesting would be for the witches to not like the word "witches" and would prefer a different title since "witches" has a negative connotation. Great job so far and I look forward to reading more!
Yours is one of the first storybooks I have found that is using a first-person narrative. I'm excited for it! I like that you're presenting your other stories in the style of a witchy forum of sorts. I think it could be really cool to see different fonts/color themes/writing styles for each story to represent the different viewpoint of each character. You're presenting an interesting paradox by setting up the stories of the 'Wicked Witches' with a positive connotation of rehabilitation and self-discovery, but you're setting up the 'Good Witches' as having mistakes in their past. I am excited to see how you continue this story.
Aside from ideas about the continuation of your story, I would love to see more development of Princess Ozma. She must be fairly old if she has seen Dorothy arrive and leave as well as a change of heart in the Wicked Witches. Why is she a princess instead of a Queen?
I was maybe halfway through your introduction, and I knew I was hooked! I am a huge fan of looking at the “other sides” of well-known stories. It almost makes me think of Wicked, and how it is a sort of prequel to the Wizard of Oz. However, your story is original in that it is after Dorothy, it just explains that there is, like you pointed out, more than one side to a story.
I enjoyed your first story about the Good Witch of the North! I was a little surprised that her tale was more about her sister, rather than herself, but it was very well written. I felt like I was hearing a story from someone I knew. I was very nice and easy to read. I also enjoyed the little lessons at the end of the story, but they did feel a little short. I think it would be lovely to see the lessons expanded on or more prominent in the story the witches are telling.
This is going to be a fantastic storybook and I can’t wait to read what else you come up with!
Hey Marielle! I think this is a really cool concept, looking at the individual witches and telling there stories to make them more relatable or different from peoples perceptions! I also think that the dinner party, let me tell you a story vibe works well for the kind of narrative you are going for. I think that you could make the verbiage more... colloquial? Right now it just seems very formal but that could just be the characters way of speaking I guess. i like that it's written like you are hearing a speech, because that really fits with what you set up in the introduction. I think that it will be interesting to see how the voice of the characters change person to person to differentiate themselves from the speaker before and after. How are you going to do this? Are there going to be particular tones that each one has? Or narrative style (one's more causal etc.) I think this is great and I can't wait to read more.
I love the concept for your Storybook, and cannot wait to learn if more inspiration from Wicked will be interspersed with interpretation of L. Frank Baum's original series! You might also consider the characterization of the Wicked Witch from ABC's Once Upon a Time. Still, my initial reading of your content left me with several questions about your characters. First, we will get a story about Ozma during the semester? Your introduction left me wanting to know more about her, and I am hoping that she will be featured throughout the stories of the four other witches you have mentioned. Next, why is Locasta so afraid of her sister? Your story repeatedly mentioned that Locasta avoided confronting Mombi's evil, but never seemed to elaborate on why. I think if you added more detail here, you could better develop Locasta's character.
I am exciting to see how your Storybook continues to grow!
I originally just read your introduction last time, but I see that you have included your first story. Let me tell you, I am in love with your storybook! Your stories are well written and have really catch the attention of your readers. I found myself wanting to keep reading and find out what happened. While I am not someone who is familiar with the Land of the OZ books, I have only seen the movie, you incorporate enough details into your author's notes to understand what is going on.
I liked the small twists that you did to the original story, with making the two witches sisters and having the good witch kill her evil sister. I also liked that you included a moral aspect to Locasta about how she felt and the lessons from killing her sister. I feel that this added to your story.
As you continue developing your stories, it may be a good idea to incorporate more details in your author's note. There may be other readers like myself that are unfamiliar with the original OZ stories, and have only seen the movie. This can lead readers being confused on who is what character and their role in your storybook.
Overall, I am really enjoying your storybook and look forward to reading more!
I enjoyed reading the first of your stories this time around, especially as I already ready through your intro in a previous week. I had no idea that there was more than one witch of the north, and even less of an idea that the Oz lore went so deep. I think that the plot of Locasta's story kind of ties the bridge between what I know and what I don't... after all, it explains why there's no wicked witch of the north in the movie!
I think the narrative style that you use really helps fill in details directly. It feels like Locasta is really the one telling the story, and it has a strong message that she delivers. I think that it might be neat if there was more buildup to the confrontation between the two sisters, as that could help draw attention to her development of courage. That way, she wouldn't have to explain her lesson in as much detail at the end!
I'm very much enjoying what you have written, and hope to see how these stories develop.
Hi Marielle! I really like how you are doing a Land of Oz themed storybook that is about the Witches of Oz. So many people know about the Wizard of Oz and Dorothy but so few of them know that there are a lot of great stories from other people in that universe. I really liked how you used first person to introduce your story because that really pulls the reader in. It was great seeing that your first story also used first person and I think that is a great theme to stick with. I think it was a great choice relating the two Witches of the North because that makes Locasta killing her sister even harder for her. My only feedback for you would be to go in depth about Ozma more as we are kind of thrown into the story without knowing much about her. I cannot wait to read the rest of your stories.
Hi Marielle! I love that you're doing a storybook set in the Land of Oz. The Wizard of Oz was my favorite movie when I was little, so I'm excited to see how you explore Oz through your storybook. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz is the only one of Frank Baum's Oz books that I've read, and I actually only read it earlier this year, so most of the stories you'll be telling will probably be new to me. I love the idea of exploring the witches backstories more, and showing that the wicked witches aren't all bad and the good witches aren't all good.
Hi Marielle! First off I would like to compliment your choice of topic. I think it is brilliant to incorporate something that others may be a bit familiar with since some of us are more familiar with the Wizard of Oz than Mythology and Folklore. Ok, not all of us? Just people like me that did not pay the best attention in school when it came to this topic, haha. Overall, this addition really drew me in and got me excited about reading each of your stories. Even without know the great depth beyond the Wizard of Oz, your descriptions made any reader able to follow and make sense of your story. I was unaware of the fact that there was more than one witch of the north, but your details worked everything out in my mind as I continued on reading. Thank you so much for sharing and I hope to read more of your stories in the future!
I absolutely love your pictures. They're so vivid and mystical and just fit so well into your stories. The layout of your blog is perfect for your topic as well, and the tabs "North, East, South, and West" are great because the reader can infer that it's about a certain witch, but still has tons of mystery around what they're going to be like. The Wizard of Oz is well known, but I have never heard of any other witches, other than Glenda and the Wicked Witch of the West. For your first story, I really enjoyed that it revolved around lessons that Locasta learned in her life and by what happened with her sister. I also am doing my portfolio over lessons and love that you tied in lessons in yours! I'm excited to come back and read the rest of their stories soon because I loved the Wizard of Oz growing up.
Hey Marielle! I am actually a student in the Indian Epics section of this course but was really excited that I could look at some of the Myth and Folklore storybooks. I took this class last semester and did a storybook so I know how fun but also time consuming and nerve racking it can be. I thought your storybook idea was a good one and one that many people have done before so there was a lot of previous work you could look at I am sure. I liked how in the story it was like someone was talking to you. I also liked that you really have a complete website even though not all your stories are posted. This way it gives the reader something to look forward to and expect. I myself cant wait for the last witches story because judging from the background photo you might be throwing us a curve ball maybe. I thought that it might end up being dorthy! That would be really fun it turns out to be true.
Hello Marielle! I am enrolled in the Indian Epics class and I'm really happy that we got the opportunity to explore the stories of the Myth and Folklore class! I wanted to take this class but since it was full, I decided to take the Indian Epics class instead. I really like the storybook that you created with the witches of Oz! Each witch has its own story and that is fantastic! The storybook site really goes with the witch theme, especially the green color and images. It has a wicked feel to it and it portrays the witches perfectly. I never heard of any of these stories because I never watched the Wizard of Oz or any other witch stories. It was a learning experience for me and I might even watch the movie or read the book now! Thank you for the stories and I would love to read some more of your stories in the future!
Hi Marielle, First of all I love your name. My best friends name is Marilla and it is so unique and pretty. I am from the Indian Epics class, this week we can check out some of your guys stories. I love how you word everything in your portfolio. You did such a great job at retelling your stories. I love the Wizard of Oz and grew up watching the movie. You really brought back so many memories. I love how you made the Wicked Witch of the West good and that she was becoming a better person. I love how you also set up your page. I love that it is divided up by witches. I am not big on grammar and punctuation but it all looks very good. Hopefully I get to read your last two stories. Thank you so much, have a great semester. Good luck with the last stories.
Hi Marielle! I am loving the consistent and interesting theme of your project! The pictures you’ve included are very nice additions to the aesthetic of your site. I thought it was great that Locasta shared her flaws from her past. I really like that West was able to make a turnaround in her life. One of my favorite styles of rewriting stories is giving characters happier endings, and you’ve definitely done that here. It would be really interesting if you explained a bit more of why West became evil and what her goal was. It seems that she wasn’t born evil, so did she slip into it the way Locasta’s sister did? Did Locasta’s sister drag West into the darkness with her? The super detailed author’s notes with links are helpful and allow your readers to do more research if they want. Overall, your project is coming along really nicely. I look forward to seeing what else you write!
I am from the Indian Epics class so this is a different type of project for me. In my opinion, I think it is great!! The theme is creative and a great play on the Wizard of Oz. I like how easy it is to navigate the website and how you have the labels as north, east , south, and west. That is so cool. Each of your stories was well written and easy and enjoyable to read. I like the pictures that you chose to use and how in depth the authors note is. That was really helpful to me because I haven't read any of your stories.
The only suggestion I have is to maybe give a little more information about the project on your homepage so the reader has an idea of what to expect.
Overall, great project and I am looking forward to seeing the finished project.
Marielle, I can't believe I'm just now seeing your project! I considered doing my project over something Wizard of Oz related because I have always loved the story and think it is so whimsical and fun! However, I decided to go a different route, so I was really excited to stumble across your project. First off, the layout that you chose is really great. Your banner images fit perfectly and do a great job at giving a preview into each story! I also think you portrayed the different witches characters through them telling their stories. Even though there was no dialogue and it was simply them telling their stories through first person, there was still a huge distinction between each witch, and each had their own personality that I really enjoyed. The only suggestion I have is to add an author's note to you introduction page. Your introduction by itself is really great and tells what the rest of the stories would be about, but an author's note explaining whether the stories to come are straight from the book/movie/play or if you made them up, would be really great! Great work and I can't wait to read the last story!
Hello again! I enjoyed reading your storybook so much last time that I chose it again this week to revisit! This time I wanted to focus on your second story, West. I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the story I was looking forward to all along. First off, I love how you have the green words. It was a small, fun thing that I think really added to the whole story. Like a lot of people, the Wicked Witch of the West became a new character to me after reading/listening to Wicked. I like how, instead of going backwards to before she was evil, you wrote about what happened to her after Dorothy. I like how the story was about realizing faults and changing yourself for the better. While reading, I wondered about how West had known Locasta as a child. Maybe their families were friends. Or perhaps the two just happened to meet when they were younger.
Marielle, I am very impressed by your website. I have never visited it before and chose it as my free choice this week. I am familiar with the Wizard of Oz story and movie so I was really excited to see what your storybook was about!
One thing that really caught my eye is the fact that you wrote your introduction in first person. I think that this is a really unique but effective style to catch the readers attention. Also, for me this made me feel like I was in the story, right there with Princess Ozma. Another really interesting part was all of the little twists that you made to the stories. It is sometimes hard to change a well known story, but you did a very good job! Each one of your stories is very detailed and interesting and left me wanting to read more. I do think one thing that you can work on a little bit is really making sure your author's note explains what you changed from the original story. Overall, really great job!
This is my second time reading your story! I love the changes you've made. As before, the introduction sucked me in and I was excited to read about the tales of the different witches. I like that you make the Witch of the North so vulnerable and relatable. Her story was unexpected, but I like that you married her heartbreak over killing her sister with life lessons. I'm not very familiar with the original written versions of these stories so it’s interesting to read your Author's Notes and find out about the differences between the two. For example, I didn’t know that the movie had change the Witch of the North’s name to Glinda.
Overall, I love your stories! You’re so creative with your descriptive language! I also really like the green theme you have going on for your website. Great job and I look forward to reading your last story!
Hey there Marielle! I am not sure I have ever read any of your project before and I just wanted to start off by saying how impressed I am with your writing ability. I am always struggling to find the right words or the best way to state something. It appears as though that is a very refined talent you have as I was always enjoying myself as I was reading through your stories. One of the things I was most impressed with was how well you managed the details. You always seemed to have enough that the story was immersive, but never so many that it bogged the reader down. I hope I get to read more of your work in the last few weeks of the semester. I hope you have fun with the rest of your writing assignments. Keep up the good work, and good luck with the class!
Hi again Marielle! I really enjoyed reading your storybook about the Witches of Oz that I decided to comment on your wall again since we had that option this week. I really enjoyed your story of West and I liked how you made the Wicked Witch of the West redeemable and had her team up with Locasata. However I was confused as to why in your story you said that she is working on a campaign to free the Winged Monkeys from their enslavement. I was under the impression that she was the cause for their enslavement. Perhaps you can go into more detail here so that other readers are not confused as I was. I also really liked your story about Glinda and I was happy that you kept her a good person that had many struggles she had to face to remain good. I think this shows readers that their heroes go through the same struggles that they do.
Hey Marielle! I love the color story of your site. The green really works with your theme and your photos. I think that the perspective changing is cool and I really like how each character seems to have their own very clear voice in the narrative. The way that you are explaining about the people and the descriptions of each locations is fantastic, but I feel like your story could go further. I think that adding another media type would really enrich your story, adding another photo to show the landscape or the people, or maybe adding a sound to set the mood of the scene. I like that everything related back to Ozma in the end, so we are essentially getting her story through multiple perspective and narratives. I think that your could go into more detail with the wicked witch of the west other otherwise great job. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Hi Marielle! Ever since I was young I have always been so curious about the witches who live in Oz. I remember in the original there was only the two witches who were sisters, the was the Wicked Witch of the East and the Witch of the West, but the story never discussed the witches of the North or South. I love the overall theme of your storybook project and think you did a great job with this. I really enjoy how you begin your Introduction for Witches of Oz with Princess Ozma speaking, and then the princess introduces a new witch on each page of your storybook. Awesome idea and I love your creative stories! Also, I think you made some great image choices for your storybook banners and your additional images on your project site. The images your selected are really pretty, and images always are what intrigues me to read a story book. So, I think you did a great job with this, all your images fit very well with your storybook project overall theme.
I loved coming back to your Storybook after so many weeks! It was awesome to see how your characters have grown and developed since the last time I read your work. This comment focuses primarily on South, and Glinda the Good Witch.
First, I love the social commentary that you offered through this story! You make an excellent point that goodness out of convenience is not true goodness at all. However, I could not help but notice that this story seemed to ramp up very quickly. In the beginning, the story seemed relatively lighthearted. Then, in a matter of lines, the subject became rather serious. Then, the story seemed to end suddenly. I would have loved to have seen more gradual development of Glinda’s realizations about herself, and I believe you have more room within your word count to provide that development.
I am so excited to read you final story in the next few weeks!
Hey Marielle! Nice portfolio! I love your Wizard of Oz. I love how you labeled each title as north, west, east, and south. I also love the images you have used since it is the image from the story or the movie. The green color also fits well with the tone and the story as well! Since I am from the Indian Epics class, your author's note helped me out to understand the original story before reading the story that you came up with! I also enjoyed how you focused on the witches since only time i saw that was in the musical, Wicked. Overall, nice portfolio and stories! Hope you can keep up the good work and I will be looking forward to read more stories from you!
Hi Marielle! Your introduction was awesome and really let me know immediately what was going on. I like the direction you have decided to take, using the four witches to tell four stories. It is a really innovative idea. In the second paragraph of the North Story there is a repetition of "who" that I think was just a typo. I like how each story had a moral to it and told a lesson. It was creative and different. Each of the women had different voices, but I wonder if they could be more distinct. I know that is difficult to do, since you are only one person with one voice, but it would be interesting to see if you could further separate their identities through the way they tell their stories. I am excited to see you last story!
Hi Marielle! I'm not sure how I haven't ended up on your storybook before now, but I'm glad I found it before the end of the semester! Your story for Locasta was so creative, and I really enjoyed that it and your other stories have lessons at the end. I was also very happy to see that the Wicked Witch of the West had a redemption story, and that you used a picture from Wicked! Your decision to alternate between good and bad witches was a great choice, as it helps to differentiate between the narrators. If I had any suggestions, it would be to elaborate a little more on the situation of the people in the outer edges of Oz and maybe give some sort of explanation as to why Glinda couldn't or didn't help them. Right now, it just seems a bit vague, and I found myself reading over it a few times to see if I missed something about that part. Other than that, fantastic storybook!
Hey Marielle,
ReplyDeleteI am doing something really similar to your storybook - I am focusing on a fantasy mash-up between Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Alice from Alice in Wonderland. First off, I just want to say that you did a wonderful job with your introduction! I know when I was starting mine, I had no clue how to write my introduction in a narrator/story form, and you did such a good job with it. I really like how you challenged the existing understandings and stereotypes of the witches from the original story, making the Witches of the East and West not so bad and the Witches of the North and South have a little unpredictability to them. The photos you picked for your banner and introduction page really fit the theme of your story. Your introduction is long enough for us to understand what you are going to write about, but short and sweet to get to the point and not lose your readers. I really look forward to reading your first story!
Hi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI love that you use an in-world character to set up your introduction, and I hope that we get to see more of her personality through the stories she tells. I think it's cool that you've set up a plot that will show the good sides of the wicked witches and perhaps the dark sides of the good witches. There's definitely the potential to give the characters a lot of depth through that kind of storytelling.
It sounds like Ozma is writing from after the events of the original story, so I wonder if the stories that you'll tell will come after that, too! I remember that (spoilers) the wicked witches die, so I hope you find a way to bring them back! That said, I think a "prequel" type story could be fun too, as it might give us a better idea of why everyone acted the way they did in the source material. Great intro, and good luck!
Hey Marielle! I think it's really interesting and fun that you used first person in telling this story to start off with, because I was immediately intrigued and drawn in to the story. The name Ozma is really clever as well. I think you did a great job of telling the readers what the upcoming stories are going to be about, as well as mentioning the good and bad sides to every story. I love those types of stories, that take famous "evil" characters and tell us why they became evil or tell us that the story we have grown up reading is only half of the story! Some of the characters in your story are really popular, which gives readers something familiar to read about, and some characters are new, making your story even more interesting! Your project seems really creative, and I definitely can't wait to read the rest of it!
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI like the spin off of the Wizard of Oz that you are doing. It's interesting that the point of view is from the ruler of the land, Princess Ozma. Is this a made up character or is it from the original tale of the Wizard of Oz? Anyways, your introduction is well written and I look forward to reading the other four stories of the witches. I'm especially excited to hopefully read about how the witches became to be evil and how the others are good. This is such a classic tale and I think the readers with be drawn to it immediately. One suggestion that could help your introduction could be to include just a little more background of the witches themselves. Overall, I like the introduction and the photos in your banner and posts really add a little extra to the upcoming stories. Keep of the good work, I look forward to reading other stories!
Hi Marielle! I love the title of your website. The site itself matches your overall theme, so good job! I love that your intro depicted that the Witches won't be so bad after all. The Wizard of Oz movies make you kind of hate them... But this will be fun to change their reputations on your website! You could include some background info about Princess Ozma in your introduction, because I am unfamiliar about her (if she exists). Laying out how you plan to tell her personality might help you when you're writing future stories depicting her tone (or how others see her). I like that you're changing the narrative, and some description here and there could really help when saying why the witches aren't as bad as they once were. Did something happen to make them nicer? Or were they never that bad to begin with? Great job, can't wait to read more!
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, great title! It seems like many folk-stories are male centered and this breaks away from that and immediately puts the focus on the witches of Oz. The overall theme of the website fits very well with the topic at hand. The banner for the introduction reminds of Cinderella's castle in Disney World, providing a magical atmosphere. I was wondering who Princess Ozma was? Its been a while since i've seen The Wizard of Oz so my memory may be bad. Is Ozma something of you own creation? Maybe providing some more background information would make her character come to life. With that character background established, it will help the reader follow along with the direction of the subsequent stories. Another idea I thought would be interesting would be for the witches to not like the word "witches" and would prefer a different title since "witches" has a negative connotation. Great job so far and I look forward to reading more!
Hi Marielle,
ReplyDeleteYours is one of the first storybooks I have found that is using a first-person narrative. I'm excited for it! I like that you're presenting your other stories in the style of a witchy forum of sorts. I think it could be really cool to see different fonts/color themes/writing styles for each story to represent the different viewpoint of each character. You're presenting an interesting paradox by setting up the stories of the 'Wicked Witches' with a positive connotation of rehabilitation and self-discovery, but you're setting up the 'Good Witches' as having mistakes in their past. I am excited to see how you continue this story.
Aside from ideas about the continuation of your story, I would love to see more development of Princess Ozma. She must be fairly old if she has seen Dorothy arrive and leave as well as a change of heart in the Wicked Witches. Why is she a princess instead of a Queen?
Marielle,
ReplyDeleteI was maybe halfway through your introduction, and I knew I was hooked! I am a huge fan of looking at the “other sides” of well-known stories. It almost makes me think of Wicked, and how it is a sort of prequel to the Wizard of Oz. However, your story is original in that it is after Dorothy, it just explains that there is, like you pointed out, more than one side to a story.
I enjoyed your first story about the Good Witch of the North! I was a little surprised that her tale was more about her sister, rather than herself, but it was very well written. I felt like I was hearing a story from someone I knew. I was very nice and easy to read. I also enjoyed the little lessons at the end of the story, but they did feel a little short. I think it would be lovely to see the lessons expanded on or more prominent in the story the witches are telling.
This is going to be a fantastic storybook and I can’t wait to read what else you come up with!
Hey Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI think this is a really cool concept, looking at the individual witches and telling there stories to make them more relatable or different from peoples perceptions! I also think that the dinner party, let me tell you a story vibe works well for the kind of narrative you are going for. I think that you could make the verbiage more... colloquial? Right now it just seems very formal but that could just be the characters way of speaking I guess. i like that it's written like you are hearing a speech, because that really fits with what you set up in the introduction. I think that it will be interesting to see how the voice of the characters change person to person to differentiate themselves from the speaker before and after. How are you going to do this? Are there going to be particular tones that each one has? Or narrative style (one's more causal etc.) I think this is great and I can't wait to read more.
Hi, Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI love the concept for your Storybook, and cannot wait to learn if more inspiration from Wicked will be interspersed with interpretation of L. Frank Baum's original series! You might also consider the characterization of the Wicked Witch from ABC's Once Upon a Time. Still, my initial reading of your content left me with several questions about your characters. First, we will get a story about Ozma during the semester? Your introduction left me wanting to know more about her, and I am hoping that she will be featured throughout the stories of the four other witches you have mentioned. Next, why is Locasta so afraid of her sister? Your story repeatedly mentioned that Locasta avoided confronting Mombi's evil, but never seemed to elaborate on why. I think if you added more detail here, you could better develop Locasta's character.
I am exciting to see how your Storybook continues to grow!
Hi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI originally just read your introduction last time, but I see that you have included your first story. Let me tell you, I am in love with your storybook! Your stories are well written and have really catch the attention of your readers. I found myself wanting to keep reading and find out what happened. While I am not someone who is familiar with the Land of the OZ books, I have only seen the movie, you incorporate enough details into your author's notes to understand what is going on.
I liked the small twists that you did to the original story, with making the two witches sisters and having the good witch kill her evil sister. I also liked that you included a moral aspect to Locasta about how she felt and the lessons from killing her sister. I feel that this added to your story.
As you continue developing your stories, it may be a good idea to incorporate more details in your author's note. There may be other readers like myself that are unfamiliar with the original OZ stories, and have only seen the movie. This can lead readers being confused on who is what character and their role in your storybook.
Overall, I am really enjoying your storybook and look forward to reading more!
Hi Marielle,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading the first of your stories this time around, especially as I already ready through your intro in a previous week. I had no idea that there was more than one witch of the north, and even less of an idea that the Oz lore went so deep. I think that the plot of Locasta's story kind of ties the bridge between what I know and what I don't... after all, it explains why there's no wicked witch of the north in the movie!
I think the narrative style that you use really helps fill in details directly. It feels like Locasta is really the one telling the story, and it has a strong message that she delivers. I think that it might be neat if there was more buildup to the confrontation between the two sisters, as that could help draw attention to her development of courage. That way, she wouldn't have to explain her lesson in as much detail at the end!
I'm very much enjoying what you have written, and hope to see how these stories develop.
Hi Marielle! I really like how you are doing a Land of Oz themed storybook that is about the Witches of Oz. So many people know about the Wizard of Oz and Dorothy but so few of them know that there are a lot of great stories from other people in that universe. I really liked how you used first person to introduce your story because that really pulls the reader in. It was great seeing that your first story also used first person and I think that is a great theme to stick with. I think it was a great choice relating the two Witches of the North because that makes Locasta killing her sister even harder for her. My only feedback for you would be to go in depth about Ozma more as we are kind of thrown into the story without knowing much about her. I cannot wait to read the rest of your stories.
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle! I love that you're doing a storybook set in the Land of Oz. The Wizard of Oz was my favorite movie when I was little, so I'm excited to see how you explore Oz through your storybook. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz is the only one of Frank Baum's Oz books that I've read, and I actually only read it earlier this year, so most of the stories you'll be telling will probably be new to me. I love the idea of exploring the witches backstories more, and showing that the wicked witches aren't all bad and the good witches aren't all good.
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteFirst off I would like to compliment your choice of topic. I think it is brilliant to incorporate something that others may be a bit familiar with since some of us are more familiar with the Wizard of Oz than Mythology and Folklore. Ok, not all of us? Just people like me that did not pay the best attention in school when it came to this topic, haha. Overall, this addition really drew me in and got me excited about reading each of your stories. Even without know the great depth beyond the Wizard of Oz, your descriptions made any reader able to follow and make sense of your story. I was unaware of the fact that there was more than one witch of the north, but your details worked everything out in my mind as I continued on reading.
Thank you so much for sharing and I hope to read more of your stories in the future!
Hello Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely love your pictures. They're so vivid and mystical and just fit so well into your stories. The layout of your blog is perfect for your topic as well, and the tabs "North, East, South, and West" are great because the reader can infer that it's about a certain witch, but still has tons of mystery around what they're going to be like. The Wizard of Oz is well known, but I have never heard of any other witches, other than Glenda and the Wicked Witch of the West. For your first story, I really enjoyed that it revolved around lessons that Locasta learned in her life and by what happened with her sister. I also am doing my portfolio over lessons and love that you tied in lessons in yours! I'm excited to come back and read the rest of their stories soon because I loved the Wizard of Oz growing up.
Hey Marielle! I am actually a student in the Indian Epics section of this course but was really excited that I could look at some of the Myth and Folklore storybooks. I took this class last semester and did a storybook so I know how fun but also time consuming and nerve racking it can be. I thought your storybook idea was a good one and one that many people have done before so there was a lot of previous work you could look at I am sure. I liked how in the story it was like someone was talking to you. I also liked that you really have a complete website even though not all your stories are posted. This way it gives the reader something to look forward to and expect. I myself cant wait for the last witches story because judging from the background photo you might be throwing us a curve ball maybe. I thought that it might end up being dorthy! That would be really fun it turns out to be true.
ReplyDeleteHello Marielle! I am enrolled in the Indian Epics class and I'm really happy that we got the opportunity to explore the stories of the Myth and Folklore class! I wanted to take this class but since it was full, I decided to take the Indian Epics class instead. I really like the storybook that you created with the witches of Oz! Each witch has its own story and that is fantastic! The storybook site really goes with the witch theme, especially the green color and images. It has a wicked feel to it and it portrays the witches perfectly. I never heard of any of these stories because I never watched the Wizard of Oz or any other witch stories. It was a learning experience for me and I might even watch the movie or read the book now! Thank you for the stories and I would love to read some more of your stories in the future!
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all I love your name. My best friends name is Marilla and it is so unique and pretty. I am from the Indian Epics class, this week we can check out some of your guys stories. I love how you word everything in your portfolio. You did such a great job at retelling your stories. I love the Wizard of Oz and grew up watching the movie. You really brought back so many memories. I love how you made the Wicked Witch of the West good and that she was becoming a better person. I love how you also set up your page. I love that it is divided up by witches. I am not big on grammar and punctuation but it all looks very good. Hopefully I get to read your last two stories. Thank you so much, have a great semester. Good luck with the last stories.
Hi Marielle! I am loving the consistent and interesting theme of your project! The pictures you’ve included are very nice additions to the aesthetic of your site. I thought it was great that Locasta shared her flaws from her past. I really like that West was able to make a turnaround in her life. One of my favorite styles of rewriting stories is giving characters happier endings, and you’ve definitely done that here. It would be really interesting if you explained a bit more of why West became evil and what her goal was. It seems that she wasn’t born evil, so did she slip into it the way Locasta’s sister did? Did Locasta’s sister drag West into the darkness with her? The super detailed author’s notes with links are helpful and allow your readers to do more research if they want. Overall, your project is coming along really nicely. I look forward to seeing what else you write!
ReplyDeleteHey Marielle,
ReplyDeleteI am from the Indian Epics class so this is a different type of project for me. In my opinion, I think it is great!! The theme is creative and a great play on the Wizard of Oz. I like how easy it is to navigate the website and how you have the labels as north, east , south, and west. That is so cool. Each of your stories was well written and easy and enjoyable to read. I like the pictures that you chose to use and how in depth the authors note is. That was really helpful to me because I haven't read any of your stories.
The only suggestion I have is to maybe give a little more information about the project on your homepage so the reader has an idea of what to expect.
Overall, great project and I am looking forward to seeing the finished project.
Marielle,
ReplyDeleteI can't believe I'm just now seeing your project! I considered doing my project over something Wizard of Oz related because I have always loved the story and think it is so whimsical and fun! However, I decided to go a different route, so I was really excited to stumble across your project.
First off, the layout that you chose is really great. Your banner images fit perfectly and do a great job at giving a preview into each story! I also think you portrayed the different witches characters through them telling their stories. Even though there was no dialogue and it was simply them telling their stories through first person, there was still a huge distinction between each witch, and each had their own personality that I really enjoyed.
The only suggestion I have is to add an author's note to you introduction page. Your introduction by itself is really great and tells what the rest of the stories would be about, but an author's note explaining whether the stories to come are straight from the book/movie/play or if you made them up, would be really great!
Great work and I can't wait to read the last story!
Marielle,
ReplyDeleteHello again! I enjoyed reading your storybook so much last time that I chose it again this week to revisit! This time I wanted to focus on your second story, West. I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the story I was looking forward to all along. First off, I love how you have the green words. It was a small, fun thing that I think really added to the whole story. Like a lot of people, the Wicked Witch of the West became a new character to me after reading/listening to Wicked. I like how, instead of going backwards to before she was evil, you wrote about what happened to her after Dorothy. I like how the story was about realizing faults and changing yourself for the better. While reading, I wondered about how West had known Locasta as a child. Maybe their families were friends. Or perhaps the two just happened to meet when they were younger.
I can’t wait to read East whenever you write it!
Marielle, I am very impressed by your website. I have never visited it before and chose it as my free choice this week. I am familiar with the Wizard of Oz story and movie so I was really excited to see what your storybook was about!
ReplyDeleteOne thing that really caught my eye is the fact that you wrote your introduction in first person. I think that this is a really unique but effective style to catch the readers attention. Also, for me this made me feel like I was in the story, right there with Princess Ozma. Another really interesting part was all of the little twists that you made to the stories. It is sometimes hard to change a well known story, but you did a very good job! Each one of your stories is very detailed and interesting and left me wanting to read more. I do think one thing that you can work on a little bit is really making sure your author's note explains what you changed from the original story. Overall, really great job!
Hi Marielle,
ReplyDeleteThis is my second time reading your story! I love the changes you've made. As before, the introduction sucked me in and I was excited to read about the tales of the different witches. I like that you make the Witch of the North so vulnerable and relatable. Her story was unexpected, but I like that you married her heartbreak over killing her sister with life lessons. I'm not very familiar with the original written versions of these stories so it’s interesting to read your Author's Notes and find out about the differences between the two. For example, I didn’t know that the movie had change the Witch of the North’s name to Glinda.
Overall, I love your stories! You’re so creative with your descriptive language! I also really like the green theme you have going on for your website. Great job and I look forward to reading your last story!
Hey there Marielle! I am not sure I have ever read any of your project before and I just wanted to start off by saying how impressed I am with your writing ability. I am always struggling to find the right words or the best way to state something. It appears as though that is a very refined talent you have as I was always enjoying myself as I was reading through your stories. One of the things I was most impressed with was how well you managed the details. You always seemed to have enough that the story was immersive, but never so many that it bogged the reader down. I hope I get to read more of your work in the last few weeks of the semester. I hope you have fun with the rest of your writing assignments. Keep up the good work, and good luck with the class!
ReplyDeleteHi again Marielle! I really enjoyed reading your storybook about the Witches of Oz that I decided to comment on your wall again since we had that option this week. I really enjoyed your story of West and I liked how you made the Wicked Witch of the West redeemable and had her team up with Locasata. However I was confused as to why in your story you said that she is working on a campaign to free the Winged Monkeys from their enslavement. I was under the impression that she was the cause for their enslavement. Perhaps you can go into more detail here so that other readers are not confused as I was. I also really liked your story about Glinda and I was happy that you kept her a good person that had many struggles she had to face to remain good. I think this shows readers that their heroes go through the same struggles that they do.
ReplyDeleteHey Marielle! I love the color story of your site. The green really works with your theme and your photos. I think that the perspective changing is cool and I really like how each character seems to have their own very clear voice in the narrative. The way that you are explaining about the people and the descriptions of each locations is fantastic, but I feel like your story could go further. I think that adding another media type would really enrich your story, adding another photo to show the landscape or the people, or maybe adding a sound to set the mood of the scene. I like that everything related back to Ozma in the end, so we are essentially getting her story through multiple perspective and narratives. I think that your could go into more detail with the wicked witch of the west other otherwise great job. I look forward to reading more of your work.
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteEver since I was young I have always been so curious about the witches who live in Oz. I remember in the original there was only the two witches who were sisters, the was the Wicked Witch of the East and the Witch of the West, but the story never discussed the witches of the North or South. I love the overall theme of your storybook project and think you did a great job with this. I really enjoy how you begin your Introduction for Witches of Oz with Princess Ozma speaking, and then the princess introduces a new witch on each page of your storybook. Awesome idea and I love your creative stories! Also, I think you made some great image choices for your storybook banners and your additional images on your project site. The images your selected are really pretty, and images always are what intrigues me to read a story book. So, I think you did a great job with this, all your images fit very well with your storybook project overall theme.
Hi, Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI loved coming back to your Storybook after so many weeks! It was awesome to see how your characters have grown and developed since the last time I read your work. This comment focuses primarily on South, and Glinda the Good Witch.
First, I love the social commentary that you offered through this story! You make an excellent point that goodness out of convenience is not true goodness at all. However, I could not help but notice that this story seemed to ramp up very quickly. In the beginning, the story seemed relatively lighthearted. Then, in a matter of lines, the subject became rather serious. Then, the story seemed to end suddenly. I would have loved to have seen more gradual development of Glinda’s realizations about herself, and I believe you have more room within your word count to provide that development.
I am so excited to read you final story in the next few weeks!
Hey Marielle! Nice portfolio! I love your Wizard of Oz. I love how you labeled each title as north, west, east, and south. I also love the images you have used since it is the image from the story or the movie. The green color also fits well with the tone and the story as well! Since I am from the Indian Epics class, your author's note helped me out to understand the original story before reading the story that you came up with! I also enjoyed how you focused on the witches since only time i saw that was in the musical, Wicked. Overall, nice portfolio and stories! Hope you can keep up the good work and I will be looking forward to read more stories from you!
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle! Your introduction was awesome and really let me know immediately what was going on. I like the direction you have decided to take, using the four witches to tell four stories. It is a really innovative idea. In the second paragraph of the North Story there is a repetition of "who" that I think was just a typo. I like how each story had a moral to it and told a lesson. It was creative and different. Each of the women had different voices, but I wonder if they could be more distinct. I know that is difficult to do, since you are only one person with one voice, but it would be interesting to see if you could further separate their identities through the way they tell their stories. I am excited to see you last story!
ReplyDeleteHi Marielle!
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure how I haven't ended up on your storybook before now, but I'm glad I found it before the end of the semester! Your story for Locasta was so creative, and I really enjoyed that it and your other stories have lessons at the end. I was also very happy to see that the Wicked Witch of the West had a redemption story, and that you used a picture from Wicked! Your decision to alternate between good and bad witches was a great choice, as it helps to differentiate between the narrators. If I had any suggestions, it would be to elaborate a little more on the situation of the people in the outer edges of Oz and maybe give some sort of explanation as to why Glinda couldn't or didn't help them. Right now, it just seems a bit vague, and I found myself reading over it a few times to see if I missed something about that part. Other than that, fantastic storybook!